Rough enough that more than once, I thought about changing careers, becoming a hermit or just hopping on a plane, changing my name and forgetting everything about this "Stephanie" person (by the way, she clearly sucks).
Hello pitty party.
But in the midst of all of this self indulgence, I heard the voice of my Grandmama in the back of my head saying, "Oh honey, whenever God closes a door, he opens a window. Things will get better, just have faith in yourself and be thankful for all of the things you have."
And so, for this post, rather than dwelling on all the things that have made me fall off the rails this week, I will focus on 10 things that I am thankful for.
10. Good books. I mean, really good books. Books that change the way I look at the world and challenge my preconceptions.
9. Music of almost any possible kind because it is food for the soul.
8. Sweet red wine. It's perfect.
7. A cold beer on a hot day. There is NOTHING better. :)
6. Our great nation - that it is even possible for me to be sitting here with food in my belly, a roof over my head, a relatively stable government worrying about my wants rather than my needs.
5. A hot bath.
4. My Grandmama. She is my hero. She is the most cultured, loving and generous woman I have ever had the privilege of knowing. If someday I am half the woman she is, I will be doing just fine.
3. My friends who love me dearly for all my foibles and for whom I would do anything. I may not have a thousand friends, but the ones I have are the best of the best.
2. My sister - because although we fight (a lot) and we rarely see eye to eye (on anything) and sometimes, it's as if she's from another planet (Mars??) I know that in the whole world, there is no one who would stick up for me more. She's like a pitbull.
1. My husband who loves me unconditionally, who tells me that I'm not as horrible as I think I am and makes me dinner, on his birthday because I've had a shitty day at work. Yes, it's quite possible I am the worst wife ever, but I know how lucky I am.
In the words of Buddha:
"Let us rise up and be thankful, for if we didn't learn a lot today, at least we learned a little, and if we didn't learn a little, at least we didn't get sick, and if we got sick, at least we didn't die; so, let us all be thankful."